One of the most unfortunate things we have seen at Family Matters Law Group are parents who self-sabotage their own child custody case. One of our jobs as family law attorneys is to counsel our clients on how not to damage their case. Here are the top 4 ways we have seen parents lose their custody cases.
Not Being Involved with the Children
It stands to reason that if you are not involved in the daily lives of your children, you’re not going to get custody. If you are the non-custodial parent, that is not an excuse for you to be absent from your child’s life. The parent who is most involved is usually the parent who benefits exponentially in the custody case.
How often do you participate in daily activities, such as feeding, bathing, or reading a bedtime story? Do you take the child to school, and do you know the names of your child’s teachers? How often do you go to the child’s doctor appointments? Do you attend sporting events or school functions? Bottom line: not being involved is the best way to kill any chance you have of winning custody.
Not Maintaining Control of Yourself
We all know that custody cases are high-stress affairs. Often, your private business gets brought up in front of the judge. However, if you lose control, have an outburst, or an angry meltdown while you are in court, you are decreasing your chances of winning your case.
Likewise, getting upset and losing your temper in front of teachers, social workers, neighbors, etc, is a sure-fire tactic to have your outburst brought up in court. If you lose it, it’s almost a guarantee the court will find out about it. If you know you have an anger management issue, seek professional help. It will help you out and show the court you are serious about improving yourself.
Likewise, if you have trouble controlling your alcohol or drug intake, you’re going to lose your case. Substance abuse allegations are taken extremely seriously by the court and are usually investigated heavily. If you have a substance abuse issue, get help immediately.
Not Including the Other Parent
In a child custody case, emotions run high. Often, parents’ resort to trying to make the other parent look bad in front of the children. Talking trash about the other parent or actively trying to sabotage the other parent’s relationship with your child is a surefire way to lose your court case.
The last thing a judge wants to see is a parent who is so emotionally vindictive that they try to alienate the other parent or deny the other parent visitations. If you are truly looking out for the best interests of your child, you will want them to have good relationships with both parents. The court will look favorably upon you when they see evidence that you have taken steps to foster a good relationship with your ex and your children.
It’s difficult to speak kindly and act favorably towards someone that you may feel nothing but hatred for at times. But you must take that step if you intend to win custody of your child. Again, this is about showing restraint and self-control.
Not Following Your Attorney’s Advice
There is no doubt that a divorce proceeding and a custody case is a nightmare for many people. One wrong move can come back to bite you in court when you least expect it. No matter what your end goal is, be it primary custody, a suitable parenting time schedule, or joint physical custody, it is absolutely vital that you have a caring, competent attorney on your side.
An experienced family law attorney, such as Edidiong Aaron at Family Matters Law Group, can help you navigate the waters of a child custody case. They can give you valuable advice and counsel to help you avoid making mistakes that will cost you the one right you want more than any other: the right to have primary custody of your own child.
Success in your case starts with a consultation. If you are in Henry, Fayette, or Clayton Counties, Family Matters Law Group invites you to contact us via our convenient online form. We look forward to discussing your case.
